little blessings

The first week of school is fondly called "Silly-bus" week...get it? Syllabus? I know, I know, hysterical. For my friends and me, it usually means non-stop laughing, hanging out, classes that are under an hour, sunshine, and nights of drinking, dancing, and catching up. This semester though did not start out as others usually do because of a horrible tragedy within a group of my friends. Though it didn't directly effect me, the indirect effect has been great. Maybe it's because sometimes I'm considered more sensitive than others, or I wear my emotions on my sleeve, but other people's sadness (especially my friends) effects me in an overwhelming way. I tend to want to hold other people's emotions for them, carry their burdens so they hurt less, or reach out so that they feel cared about and supported. I internalize their feelings as my own in the hopes that I can relate to what they feel or help in some way. Surprisingly, my friends have been laughing, drinking, and dancing like crazy at parties, their strength coming from the fact that they're together and still have each other and are able to share memories; but seeing their Facebook statuses shows me that deep down their pain is still unbearable, still haunts them when they're alone in their rooms at night. I prayed this morning for them all that they would find solace in each other, in the beautiful day outside, and the fact that there is strength in numbers and love within each other. I believe that everything happens for a reason; that people are a part of your life for a reason, whether they come and go quickly and leave you with a lingering smile, or are in and out of your life for years, or stand by your side like a rock until your ninety, there are no mistakes as to why they've interacted with you. Sometimes I think people inadvertently take for granted the friends they have, especially the ones who sincerely care about them. Good friends are a blessing. I think every once in a while we need to take a step back and look at the people in our lives and be thankful for how lucky we are.

"To me, every hour of the day and night is an unspeakably perfect miracle." - Walt Whitman